Trash Bag

I suffer badly with panic and anxiety attacks which trigger off my OCD. I don’t know whether it is all the social isolation and coronavirus issues triggering off my illness, but it is a nightmare at the moment. Here’s something I wrote yesterday after getting through one prolonged attack that left me bedridden…

Afternoon’s here
Again
Not been a bad morning
But I can feel
That feeling
Creeping
Badass gatecrasher
Sanity stealing
Soon I’ll be dealing
With the
Shit-hits-the-fan
Fallout

Leave me alone
In my bed
My sanctity pit
I feel like
I don’t
Fit
Into this
Fucking world
Anxiety has stolen
Me away
Again
Heart hammers
A thousand thoughts
Stammer
OCD has to
Stick its pristine face in
Pass me a fuckin
Arsenic laced
Tequila slammer
Please

Its times like these where
I wonder if my mind
Is just one big
Lying sin
And my life is just
A trash bag
For keeping my
Fucked up emotions in

And I just want to
Curl up and hide
I just want to
Get off this
Shit kid’s ride
If I don’t get off
Soon
They’ll put me
Back
In-fucking
side.

©2020 Sarah Drury

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s